Youre a Funny Guy but Looks Arent Everything

Everybody wants to be considered attractive, especially when it comes to dating. And if you take a look at any of the magazines which line the check-out aisles at your local grocery store, it's easy to get the impression that physical attractiveness is the only key to finding a prospective partner. At first glance, you'd probably assume that all of these publications are targeted at women, but any guy who's ever picked up a men's magazine knows that men face a lot of pressure to be physically attractive.

Cover images feature guys with washboard abs amidst headlines like, "RAW POWER!" and "Top 15 Ways to Please Her in Bed!" so it's easy to see how these headlines send the message that men have to present a certain image of powerful sexuality. And if you worry that you don't embody these qualities— or you fear that women don't find you physically attractive— it's easy to feel anxious or insecure. But, as cliche as it sounds, the truth is that looks aren't everything! And in this article, we're going to look at a few reasons why.

Why Looks Aren't Everything

Although looks are often considered the most important part of a couple's attraction to one another, looks are often only an initial reason for attracting women. Physically attractive qualities may help you catch the eye of a prospective mate, but what happens next? For example, a woman sees you in a bar, thinks you're handsome, and thus decides to come to talk to you. But what if, once you start talking, she thinks you're boring or isn't attracted to your personality?

This is often the case for physically attractive people who lacks substance. So, it doesn't matter if a person is physically attractive in these cases! Despite their good looks, they still might struggle to develop a lasting and intimate connection with a partner who values them for more than their appearance. Conversely, suppose you have a great personality, a great sense of humor, and other attractive personal characteristics. In that case, you may find it easier to connect with people who look beyond the surface and value you simply because you're you!

So, although magazines may present the idea that looks are everything, nothing could be further from the truth! So, if you're worried that you're a physically unattractive guy, don't lose hope! You have more going for you than you know! Let's look at a few other reasons why looks truly aren't everything.

1) Looks Fade

You've probably heard the old saying "beauty fades," and it's a cliche for a reason! While it's nice to feel like you have great features and an attractive body, your physical beauty should never be the ultimate source of your self-esteem. That's because, whether you like it or not, everybody's beauty fades. The most magnificent diet, exercise regimen, and plastic surgeon combined cannot stop or reverse the signs of aging. At some point, even the world's most beautiful people will grow old and infirm.

So, if you're feeling insecure about your appearance, it's important to keep this in mind! It's also important to remember that society's conceptualization of beauty is extremely inconsistent. A quick look through history will show that beauty standards have changed drastically through the ages; what's considered attractive in one era will no longer be the standard in another. So, if we consider that societal standard and other people's perceptions of beauty change from one era to another, it's easier to see that physical attractiveness is fleeting. But traits that are unique to you, like your personality and work ethic, are timeless in their potential to attract a lasting connection with a partner.

2)Kindness Matters

We all know that it's cool to be kind, but you might have underestimated the value of kindness in a relationship. Whether you're seeking a relationship with a woman or another man, most people want to be with someone kind. Kindness is an attractive quality in a partner for various reasons. For example, a kind person generally cares about others and is considerate of their feelings. Everybody wants a partner who is thoughtful and considerate!

That's because, deep down, everyone wants to feel loved and safe in a relationship. If your partner knows that you are kind— to them, to others, and yourself— they are more likely to feel safe with you and believe that they can trust you. And because kindness is such a desirable quality in a prospective partner, kind people are also perceived as more physically attractive, even if they aren't considered conventionally attractive! In this respect, the old cliche is true: what's on the inside is what counts!

3) Attraction Shifts Over Time

If you've ever been in a relationship before, you already know that it's easy to love everything about them when you first meet and fall in love with a prospective partner. In the early stages of your relationship, you'll probably be attracted to their looks and personality, so everything about them seems attractive to you. But, as you get to know them better, you'll eventually begin to notice their flaws. Everybody has annoying habits, no matter how beautiful they are, and it's easy to be turned off by these things.

But that's good news for people who consider themselves to be unattractive! If your relationship with another person is built on the fact that you think they're sexy, that's not a very secure foundation. Eventually, that person will do things that you don't find sexy, and your relationship with them might suffer and fade as a result. But if you fall in love with someone for who they are— whether they're beautiful or not— the everyday annoyances that naturally occur in a relationship are unlikely to blow you out of the water.

It's also important to remember that attraction naturally shifts and changes over time. For example, as a young person in your twenties, you might be primarily attracted to your partner because of their looks, personality, or both. But as you both mature and evolve, you may find that you value different things, such as a person's character, stability, intelligence, or core values. These things are much more valuable and important than physical beauty because these are the qualities at the core of a deep and lasting relationship. So, if you feel like you don't have a lot to offer in the looks department, don't despair! Your other qualities are ultimately much more important.

Finding Help and Hope

If you feel insecure about your appearance, it can take a toll on your mental and emotional health. Although physical attractiveness is not the most important thing, the sad reality is that our society values beauty to an unhealthy degree. So, if you feel like you don't measure up to those standards, it can make you feel insecure. These insecurities can profoundly impact your mental health and your overall quality of life.

It can be especially difficult for men to battle these struggles due to a culture of toxic masculinity that has conditioned men to believe that they should "man up" by repressing their emotions, avoiding therapy, and refusing to talk through their feelings. So, if you find yourself feeling any of these things, you should know that you are not alone and you don't have to struggle in silence!

Suppose you feel that you are unattractive, having trouble finding a partner, or experiencing feelings of low self-esteem. In that case, you may benefit from connecting with a licensed mental health professional who can support you and provide you with positive coping mechanisms that will help you work through your feelings. People often have a lot of misconceptions about therapy, but the truth is that therapy is for everybody! And you don't have to wait until you're in crisis to pursue therapy.

Just as you would go to a doctor for anything that is impacting your physical health, you can go to a therapist for anything affecting your mental and emotional wellbeing. So, if you want to work through your feelings and improve your self-esteem, the licensed therapists at ReGain are available to help! Online therapy through ReGain is accessible and affordable for everyone who needs it. The convenience of online therapy means that you can fit your therapy sessions around your schedule with ease.

So, if you're worried that others perceive you as unattractive, it's important to remember that you are not alone in this anxiety; many people worry that they don't measure up to society's beauty standards! It's also important to remember that, as cliche, as it sounds, looks truly are not the most important thing in a relationship. The qualities that lie beneath the surface matter most because that's what makes you who you are. But, of course, it's one thing to say that. Understanding and truly feeling it is another matter that can sometimes be difficult to do on your own.

So, if you're struggling with your relationships, self-image, and self-esteem, you should know that the therapists at ReGain are always available to help you. Help is only a click away, so don't be afraid to reach out today!

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Are looks important in life?

I want to say I want to, but it would be untrue many times. Just live everything else; it all starts with how inviting it looks on the outside. It's like getting a car; you would not be worried about how smooth it drives when the looks do not compliment that functionality. For this reason and others like this, you can join most people in saying looks are everything. But is it that difficult to look good? Not having facial hair or not being the curviest person in your clique does not make you any less attractive. All you'd need to do is understand who you are, how you look, come to terms with your body, and find a way to make it work.

One common misconception is that you have to go out of your way or break the bank to look good. Although money gives you access to top-shelf items, you can still look your best and turn heads with a budget. You can use social media to look up people with the same body type as you, look at how they pull it off, emulate some of it, and add a touch of your style. Maybe looks are everything; maybe you have found a way to change your wardrobe; all these would not matter until you begin to accept and appreciate yourself.

What matters more – personality or looks?

There is no one answer to this question. It is subjective and dependent on what you want in your partner. Although a recent study in the year 2020 asked 1000 people to choose if they are more likely to be attracted to someone else based on their looks or personality. If looks are everything, we would expect to see the percentage much higher on that front, but that was not the case. The looks are everything argument does not hold any water as this study showed that 46% of the total number of people picked personality overlooks. 45% of all the men that took part also went for personality, with women coming in strong at 46.5%

Why would that be? You may ask yourself, in a world where people are constantly going above and beyond to look better and be more sexually appealing, you would think that looks would indeed be everything. It comes with what is expected fundamentally in any relationship or partnership. In the honeymoon stage, maybe looks are everything. Still, as time goes by, you want commitment and stability from your partner, and only a good personality can assure you of that and more in your relationship.

Are looks important when dating?

People have different ideas of what a relationship should be to them. Some people want a partner they can hold hands in the park with, take long walks, show off on Twitter and enjoy the moment. You could say looks are everything to people like this, and you cannot blame them; different people want different things, and that's okay.

Other people might say they want more than a good face or beach body; they might say that the face and body might age down the years, so they want something timeless in their partner. And in many cases, that timeless feature is often a good character in their partner that compliments theirs.

People in the latter group are more likely to enjoy time alone, make each other laugh and giggle, appreciate each other's company and make plans for now and the future.

Do looks matter in a relationship?

It depends on who you are asking. To some people, looks are everything in their relationship. And some others would want more from a relationship than just a good-looking partner. We must understand and appreciate that people are different, and there are no wrong answers. But depending on how long you want the relationship to last, how productive you would like your partnership to be, and for the most fun, you might want to be with someone you connect with on a deeper level than looks.

There are a lot of responsibilities involved when a relationship is concerned. When you are in a relationship, your partner becomes a huge part of your life; they are part of your plans and share your happiness/Pain. For these reasons and more, you need to be able to talk freely, share your emotions, pick their brains, close your eyes and see yourself together in the distant future. And for this, you need more than looks; if a serious relationship is what calls to you, you would be wrong to think looks are everything.

Do looks matter in life?

The short answer would be yes, but not how you would think. Some would even say looks are everything, but this is only true to some extent. This is only true to a certain extent because good looks are subjective; some people think looking good is only about natural features like a streamlined jaw or bright eyes, but that's untrue as you can design your wardrobe to focus on your flattering features.

When you find the right wardrobe tweak and accessories to make you look your best, only then would you be able to enjoy the benefits of looking good, and only then can you say that looks are everything. This is because looks give an insight into an individual's life. It allows you to make swift (not always accurate) conclusions about the person. Doing this makes it easier to connect with people and serves as a security feature, as some looks can in some ways call for caution.

Do good looks help in life?

To truly understand this question and appreciate the answer, you must understand why looks matter, let alone consider if looks are everything. Looks matter in our everyday life because we are not cooped all day indoors; looks matter as much as we think because we spend every day socializing with people and making new acquaintances. It is very unlikely that a person on the face of the earth lives only by their means and does not need help from anyone. When you go grocery shopping, you would need to talk to the attendant; when you pick up your kids from school, you need to talk to someone in charge. Every facet of our daily living requires us to connect with someone else, and this is where how we look into the fray.

How you are dressed often influences how you are addressed, this is why people often go above and beyond to ensure that their looks send a good message. In a world where we constantly contact people we might not engage, the only thing that speaks for us is that first impression and your looks are a very big part of that experience.

Should I go for looks or personality?

When it comes to relationships and, generally, matters of the heart, it is difficult to tell people what to do or how to act. It all boils down to what you want from your relationship and doing whatever preserves that bond or makes you happy. But if we are to weigh in, being with someone good-looking might make for a picture-perfect relationship. Your relationship might get all the engagements on social media, but what happens to life outside public views and perception. What is your relationship like when you are not getting likes and re-tweets on the Internet? This is where personality comes in; when you are with someone perfect for you, someone who can share your feelings, hopes, and dreams, will feel whyou ole. Those are your options, and the choice is ultimately up to you.

How do you know if you have physical attraction?

Physical attractiveness is when someone is drawn to another individual for their physical features. This could be facial symmetry body proportions, among others. This is totally normal and even considered biological as this fondness makes it easy to pick out a mate and ensure gene continuity. People subconsciously attribute good health, intelligence, fertility, among others, to people they consider physically appealing. You can know you fall in this category when you constantly want to be in the other person's company when you always long to have conversations with them to share the moments and experiences.

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Source: https://www.regain.us/advice/attraction/unattractive-men-why-looks-arent-everything/